I feel that to be happy, you must be honest; with yourself, with your family and with your friends. This is something that I’ve learned over the past year while struggling with some overwhelming choices and my own mental health.
I put too much stock in pleasing people; my parents mostly, but I also didn’t want to let my friends down, or be the only one to drop out of university.  I wasn’t honest about how I felt, and while my friends knew to some extent that I’d been unhappy (although even that didn’t come to light until Christmas), no one really knew the extent of my misery. I’m aware of how dramatic I sound, but, if I’m being honest, I had gotten myself into such a situation that I couldn’t see any feasible way out, leading to me becoming more stressed and upset, and ultimately being unable to do the right thing for me.

                When people asked how university was going, I smiled and said all the right things, while inside I was trying to muster up the courage to say “Actually, I hate it, I don’t like the course, or the town” and it wore me down so much. I was a wreck; I didn’t eat or socialise, and I spent my evenings (and most of my days) crying in my room.

                It didn’t help that when I tried to be honest, going to the student welcome centre and to the head of my department, I didn’t feel like my concerns were being met seriously, and felt rather dismissed. Rather than helping, I do feel like they put me off seeking further help, which in turn prevented me from transferring to a different university.

                I finally came clean to my mother about how I was feeling during the summer, but by then it was too late to drop out. I’m now in my second year, looking to transfer, which is a lot more difficult, and I’ve had a few no’s already which is quite demoralising. However, I feel like the whole experience has made me stronger, given me the ability to see what I want, and made me realise that my parents were right when they said “honesty is the best policy”.